I Think The Genre Has Changed - Chapter 118: Transformation

 Emotions that had been held back for days burst like a dam that had been accumulating pressure. The consciousness, swept away by the waves, traced back memories to the first day of possession and followed the emotions that came afterward.

Initially, it was so chaotic that it couldn’t be expressed solely with the word “confusion.” Every day in a life suddenly forced upon him was bewildering, and he clung to the goal of returning home, grasping onto a precarious sanity.

When it first shattered during the conversation with Kang Sihyun, he wanted to die right then and there. However, thoughts of his sister, who would mourn his death, came to mind, and he resisted the impulse to succumb, remembering the words his sister used to say. Resignation was what he excelled at. That’s what he believed he had accepted reality once again.

Whether it was a fleeing to avoid facing the moment or not, there were things that never became familiar. Even though it was time to get used to them now. For Sihyun, the time after that day was like that.

The realization of reality was a fleeting moment of rational thought, and every day in this unfamiliar world was filled with anxiety. Lost like a ship without direction, he wavered, shaken, as his goal, which was to achieve a comfortable life, slipped away like a directionless compass. So, perhaps, he ambiguously behaved towards others and clung to the existence of a day because he himself had lost his identity, and at the same time, he needed someone who could consistently behave towards him.

Pushed away, accepted, resigned, rebelled again. If he were a character in a novel, even readers wouldn’t have been able to understand him. He couldn’t even understand himself properly.

He always swallowed those emotions alone. Enduring until they piled up and festered was one of his bad habits, but there was no other way to deal with it.

And now, finally, after a long time, he thought he had found his place. But the most burdensome anxiety he had ever experienced struck him. He was pretending to endure it alone, but it was uncovered by Baek Geonu and the children. And they did it in a very affectionate and gentle way.

Always holding back even his own emotions, they made him someone who couldn’t endure it.

No, maybe he had already reached his limit long ago.

So, in just a few hours, he felt that he had collapsed due to what had happened.

Unbearable sobs filled the room. Crying out loud was very rare. Fortunately, Kang Sihyun’s parents were not present; otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to lift his head due to embarrassment. As soon as he entered the room, Pia, who was sleeping, fluttered around in confusion as he burst into tears.

Kang Sihyun, who embraced the sobbing figure, wiped away falling tears with one hand. Sniffling and swallowing his runny nose, he tightly shut his mouth. The fact that those who had been pushed away by him were by his side when he was at his weakest moved him to tears. They deliberately called him to change his mood and cared for him all day. That reassured him, and at the same time, it made him tear up. Life was tough. The fluctuating emotions made him even more despondent.

After crying for a long time, Sihyun felt his throat clogged and exhaled a hot breath. After letting it all out, the heavy burdens gradually lightened. After a long time, he felt a throbbing headache. Exhausted, he sat down and groped for his blocked throat, sniffing.

The sound of the clock ticking echoed in the room. The emotions that had undulated like waves gradually subsided. In the room where sobbing had been frequent, only the regular sound of breathing could be heard.

Finally feeling a sense of calm, Sihyun noticed a paper bag given by the children in his field of vision. Staring at it for a while, he hesitated before moving to search through the bag. As items came out one by one, his melancholy was forgotten, and a sense of absurdity emerged.

“… What is this?”

Starting with strangely shaped animal pajamas, various useless items such as a pink children’s watch, a kindergarten-worthy jewel necklace, and an 18-color crayon popped out of the bag. As he chuckled at the absurdity, something luxuriously wrapped caught his fingers. Upon checking, it was a lavender-scented diffuser. The unique and gentle scent of lavender gradually seeped through the packaging.

‘Mental stability.’

Sihyun ran his fingers over the note written in Hamin’s handwriting on the post-it attached to the wrapping paper. Mental stability. Although a short and simple phrase, it seemed to convey what he wanted to say. It was Hamin’s awkward attempt at comforting. The calmness he had managed to achieve was disrupted once again.

Swallowing as if to soothe that, he continued to check the paper bag. This time, a large laughing sticker appeared. On the vinyl wrapping, there was writing in black pen.

‘Smiling suits you.’

It had a middle school student’s handwriting, with varying sizes and awkwardness. Despite the awkwardness, the character in the sticker, laughing broadly, looked happy.

“…They asked for a good laugh, I guess.”

What’s with the sticker? A sticker?

Feeling both pitiful and typical of Hamin, Sihyun laughed. After finishing shopping for clothes, they had hurriedly sent him to the restaurant, claiming to have urgent matters, but it seemed they had been preparing something like this. When he received the paper bag from them, the gifts didn’t show through the clothes, and he didn’t notice strange items each time they visited a miscellaneous goods store. It made him feel oddly touched.

Since Hamin’s and Haru’s items were there, he assumed the others also had something for him and continued checking. Eye masks and wasabi were found, gifts from Geonu and Haewoon. Geonu’s letter, suggesting to use it if needed, revealed his personality. Chuckling, Sihyun looked at the green wasabi, and then his expression stiffened. Curious about what it was, he examined the small box and found a letter on the outside, presumably from Haewoon.

‘Guy Kang Sihyun! No tears except for when your nose stings from eating wasabi!’

“…”

The touch faded instantly. Looking at the wasabi with cold eyes for a moment, Sihyun sighed and explored the remaining items inside. Neatly wrapped, another gift caught his attention. Even without a letter, the packaging made it clear whose gift it was.

Unlike the gifts from the other kids, this one didn’t have a written note. Opening it, Sihyun tilted his head when he saw the case. It was hard to guess what the gift was. Carefully revealing it, he found wireless earphones.

‘Consider what it means.’

Along with the note, wireless earphones were visible. It was the expensive earphones he had heard about. Slightly confused about whether it was okay to receive such gifts, Sihyun, with a bewildered look, shifted his attention to the note.

Whether it meant to make a call or to listen to comforting music, he wasn’t sure. Rolling the small case in his hands for a moment, Sihyun began to decipher Seowoo’s intentions. Sorting through the gifts one by one, he organized them. The diffuser was placed on the desk, the warm compress was heated immediately, and the laughter sticker was hesitantly attached to the back of his phone. He tested the wireless earphones to see if they worked, then left them in the case. Finally, he moved Haewoon’s wasabi to the desk instead of placing it on the floor.

After organizing all the clothes and various items, the room became tidy. Even though he had cleaned the room, it felt like his complex emotions had also been organized. Sitting on the bed in a calm state, Sihyun placed the heated compress on his reddened eyes.

“Pweep?”

Pia, seemingly curious about the identity of the warm compress, pecked at it with his beak. Concerned that it might burst, Sihyun dried him off, feeling the warmth of the warm compress relaxing his body. Lavender scent wafted through his nostrils. In the peaceful atmosphere, Sihyun, who had taken a rest, began to analyze again the words Kang Sihyun had said earlier.

The fact that someone interfered with his thoughts still sent shivers down his spine to the point of being creepy.

Kang Sihyun’s bet with ‘that’ regarding him was still unknown, and the uneasy elements still lingered around.

However, Kang Sihyun claimed that ‘that’ existence had been caught manipulating his mind, so there was no need to worry about mental manipulation. Since there was nothing he could do to prevent worrying and being anxious, it was wise to simply stop thinking about it. Instead, he had to keep in mind what ‘that’ would do to make him think of this place as a novel. What was certain was that, regardless of who ‘that’ was, the existence named ‘that’ was hostile towards him, and the ally was Kang Sihyun. If Kang Sihyun considered himself an ally, he just had to heed the advice Kang Sihyun gave.

The first advice was not to think of this world as a novel, so Sihyun took off the warm compress he had placed on his eyes. Looking at the white ceiling where he could see, the faces of the children he had seen a moment ago came to mind. They were the ones who had worried about him during his two-day disappearance, collecting various gifts. Just thinking about it made him feel moved again, and warm emotions surged as if he were about to cry.

In a place where his undeniable people were present,

This place was reality.

They were not characters from a novel; they were real people by his side.

Sihyun finally accepted the fact without distorting it, willingly making space for them inside him.

Feeling a bit unfamiliar, he flexed his hands. He decided not to dwell on clichés like being the protagonist or whatever. Looking at Hamin, he decided to stop thinking about whether he was the protagonist of an inso novel, taking a slow breath.

He wasn’t someone who had been possessed in a novel.

Since his original body was dead anyway, thinking of it as a rebirth made sense. With this in mind, Sihyun thought of Nuna one last time.

“She must be living well…”

As always, she was stronger than him. A person several times tougher than himself, calming his anxious heart. Calling the missed name, Pia, who had been playing with his head, tilted his body, making a questioning sound.

“I didn’t call you.”

Holding Pia in his arms, Sihyun smiled softly.

After a long period of wandering and tribulations, genuine tranquility, untainted by falsehood, had arrived. The lavender scent filled the entire room. In this moment of inhaling the fragrance, it felt like all worries had disappeared. Sihyun, feeling relaxed, slowly got up.

He had now fully accepted this place. He humbly acknowledged his state and decided to change. The next step was to face the people around him properly. Even though he had pushed away with all his might, they had persistently taken his heart away and given him theirs. To do that, Sihyun picked up his phone.

Perhaps the person who experienced the most confusion after his possession would be contacted with a message. With a deep breath, he pressed the send button after typing a message. The completed transmission message appeared in his blue eyes.

[Talk to me.]

It was a message sent to Down.

Reading and contemplating the message, Sihyun closed his eyes and saw the response a little later.

[Come to our house.]

Thump, calming his heartbeat, pulsating from tension, he recalled everything that had happened so far. It was August now, and the possession had happened in February, roughly about seven months. During this long period, he had maintained clumsy lies and a pitiful performance. Now was the time to put an end to it.

There was a time when he thought he had started wrong with the first button. Today was the day to correct it. Sihyun, thinking it was time to rectify that, took a deep breath and stepped outside.

It was the first step.